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I am still a twitter newbie.  It wasn’t too long ago that I had to google “RT” to see what the abbreviation stood for (retweet, in case you, like me, are new to this world).  I am still very inconsistent, and will sometimes go for days or weeks without using twitter AT ALL.

I was planning to look back over 2012 to see which of my tweets were “favorited” or “retweeted” the most… but I (just now) discovered that my history only goes back 6 months.  So, instead, here are some of my own personal favorites.

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

Statistician walks into just your average bar. Bartender says “We don’t serve statisticians.” Statistician says, “Well you’re just mean.”

Dear ‘cool people’ they didn’t name a candy after you, did they? Sincerely, Nerds

“Do you like statisticians?” “probably.”

Statisticians tried to use grant money to pay for bill at a strip club. They explained that they were performing a ‘posterior analysis’.

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from @TAanderud presentation because it was a weapon of math disruption. #joke #notreally #WUSS2012 (@TAanderud stopped following me after I tweeted this, so I guess it was bad twitter manners… but I still think it’s a funny joke)

Without geometry, life is pointless.

Seven days without humor make one weak

Hey #SASusers, I’m getting pretty good that the RASTINATE Proc. Get it?! Proc Rastinate. Ok, maybe the weekend should start early for me.

We don’t serve tachyons here. . . . A tachyon walked into a bar. (This joke is super funny… I can’t believe that only one person RTed it… google tachyon if you don’t get the joke).

New years resolution for the bankrupt gardener was to forget the past and rely on the fuchsia.

A person sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.


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